


Pancakes

by nevergoingtobegreat



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: College AU, Fluff, Funny, M/M, jeanmarco, pranking wars, they're a thing but they arent the main plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-31
Updated: 2014-05-31
Packaged: 2018-01-27 15:51:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1716155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevergoingtobegreat/pseuds/nevergoingtobegreat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jean and Eren have had a pranking war going on for a long time, and Jean has a master plan to get back at him from his last prank.  (Jeanmarco is a thing, but its not exactly a main plot)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pancakes

**Author's Note:**

> The first part is in a random person's perspective, and it doesn't really matter who (I didn't write with anyone in mind), but you can make it whoever you want if you care that much. The rest is in Jean's perspective. Enjoy the dumb-ness of it all, and sorry if you hate it.  
> Prompt: "Who shows up here and orders pancakes at one in the morning?"  
> (Also titles are clearly not my thing I'm sorry)

**Part 1: The Prep Work**

                Working the late shift was awful.  Our shop just _had_ to be open 24/7, despite the fact that we almost never got business past 11pm.  I couldn't even sleep, because I'd get fired, so it left me chugging a coffee down every once in a while to stay awake.  I was about to start making myself another coffee, when the doors swung open, and two guys walked in.  I glanced at my watch, and sighed.  _1:08_. I wanted my coffee, goddamn it, not customers. 

                The two guys looked like they were second or third year college.  One was wearing a ridiculous red beanie, and a determined expression.  His eyes were narrowed, and he was grinning wickedly.  The other was freckled and seemed cautious; like he was doing something he shouldn't, and didn't want to get caught.  Beanie guy sauntered up to me, and slammed his hands down on the counter with a crazy grin.

"We need 100 pancakes,"  He said, as if it was a matter of life or death., which it obviously wasn't.  Who shows up here and orders pancakes at one in the morning, anyways?  I mean, our pancakes are good, but they aren't _that_ good. 

"Please,"  Freckles chimed in from behind Beanie.

"No, Marco.  Please means we're making a request.  This is not a request.  This is an order!  We _need_ those 100 pancakes."

"Er-"  I started. "I'm not sure if I can do that..."

"FUCK!"  Beanie exploded, throwing his hands up in the air and spinning away from the counter.  I flinched involuntarily.  He was so loud, and overdramatic.

"Jean... calm down,"  Freckles (whose name appeared to be Marco) grabbed his shoulder and made him sit in one of the red booths.  "I'm really sorry...  Look, is there any chance we can get this to work?"

I started to shake my head apologetically, but Marco cut in before I could say no.

"They don't have to be prepared to eat, or anything!  We're using them for a prank... If that makes anything easier?"  He looked so pleading, I kind of felt bad.  Plus, I wanted to know what on Earth their prank was going to be- and why it required 100 pancakes.

"I- uh... I'm the only one here, so I suppose I could _try_.  I mean, anything for a prank, right?"  I grinned.

"Thank  you so much!"  Marco's smile erupted and-  _wow he has a nice_ smile. 

"This'll show Jaeger,"  Jean sniggers with a devilish grin.

"Jaeger... as in _Eren Jaeger?_ "  I had heard that name before I just couldn't remember where...

"Yeah.. why?" Jean asked suspiciously.

"Oh!"  I remembered one night, my roommate came in with a bloody nose- he had gotten in a fight with some kids over nothing at all.  Eren was the kid who punched him in the nose.  "He got into a fight with a friend of mine over something really dumb.  That kid needs a good pranking.  What's your plan, then?"

"Well, it's kind of a long story..."

"Dude, I'm going to be making 100 pancakes.  I've got a lot of time."

                The two of them laughed, and I started getting the stuff together.

"Good point, man."

"Right, well... Eren and Jean have had this pranking war going on since forever.  I honestly can't remember when it started..."  Marco paused, thinking for a moment. "Anyways, this one time, Eren hid all of Jean's shirts throughout the dorm.  A lot of them were in really obvious places but some took Jean weeks to find.  He just found the last one last week I think... It was really funny- but Jean was so mad."

"I had a right to be!  He hid my favourite shirt so that I couldn't find it for two weeks.  I had to go two weeks without my favourite shirt!"

"That was three weeks ago,"  Marco continued, but nodded at Jean as if to say _I understand,  Eren is an ass hole._  "...and Jean still hasn't done anything back-"

"I'm lulling him into a false sense of security!"  Jean interrupted again.  Marco just shook his head, but smiled. 

"Eren is having a party tonight, and he asked people to bring food.  So, Jean is technically doing as he asked- but his master plan is to number them, one to 100, and hide them throughout his apartment."  He finished.

"Two questions,"  I admitted, as I put another few pancakes into a to-go box.

"Shoot,"  Marco smiled.  "It probably doesn't make much sense, I'm surprised you don't have more questions."

"Well I'm wondering how you're going to pull it off- but why pancakes, and why number them?"

"I will tell you why,"  Jean said, standing up.  "First of all- Eren hates pancakes for some reason.  We think it's some sort of disease.  And second, the numbers.  Right- let's say you found a pancake in your apartment after a party.  Then you find a few others.  You kind of just assume that there's a few pancakes because parties get wild and you never know.  But- picture this-  you stumble upon a pancake with the number 38 on it.  You start to ask yourself _Why 38? Why not 1, or 17?_ The madness begins.  You then find more pancakes, numbered, 15, 58, 97 and 43.  You desperately try to figure out what the numbers could mean.  But you find no pattern to the numbers.  That leaves only one explanation.  You have pancakes numbered from 1-100 in your apartment.  And the madness deepens.  He searches frantically for 100 pancakes, and can't focus on anything until he finds all 100 pancakes.  It's brilliant!"

"Oh my god,"  I couldn't manage any other words.  His plan was simultaneously hilarious and genius.

"It's fantastic, right?"

"Absolutely!" I agreed.  It really was, and I couldn't wait to hear about it.

"Thank you!  Marco says its dumb." He said, clearly proud of himself.

"So why are you here, then?"  I turn to Marco questioningly

Marco's cheeks reddened.

"Uh- He threatened to- not talk to me for a week..."  He stuttered.   Jean started laughing, but quickly tried to cover it as a cough by holding his arm up to his mouth.

"And you believed him?"

"You don't know how serious he gets about these things." Marco warned, still red.

"I see..." I said doubtfully.  I had a feeling there was more to it, but I left it, and got to work.

                After that, we made a little bit of small talk, but mostly, I made the pancakes in silence, and they numbered them with a black Sharpie.  After I finished, and punched the order into the machine, they were almost out the door when I called out:

"You guys have to tell me how this goes down!"

"Of course!"  They both waved, and laughed, walking out the door.  As the doors closed behind them, Marco's hand reached down to take Jean's.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Part 2: The Prank**

                As Marco and I left the place, I smirked at my genius.  Marco's hand slipped into my own and I squeezed it lightly.

"Ready Marco?"

"Yeah, I guess,"  He said with a shrug.  He rubbed the back of his freckled neck, and glanced at the ground.

"Come on.  Eren was already pretty drunk when we left, so he won't catch us.  Sasha and Connie will help us when we get there.  We've got this planned out."

"Yeah I know I just don't really want to get involved in your crazy pranking wars,"  He laughed.  "I only agreed because you forced me."

"I didn't force you.   I just threatened to not have sex with you for a month,"  I grinned.   It was cruel, but necessary for the whole thing to go off smoothly.  "Nice cover, by the way.  Not talking for a week.  As if I could ever shut my mouth."

"Well I wasn't exactly going to blurt out what you _actually_ said!"  He laughed.  "Imagine if I had..."

"Thank god you didn't,"  I felt my cheeks go hot at the idea of what would have happened if Marco did tell the dude.   I shook my head and tugged on Marco's hand to pull him along faster.  Eren's place was the building around the corner, and I wanted to get in there and back out as quickly as we could.

"Jean..."  Marco whispered as we got in the small, dim elevator.

"Yeah?"  The doors slid closed and I pressed the button for the 5th floor.  It light up, and gave the other buttons surrounding it a dim orange-y glow.

"I can't believe we're hiding pancakes in Eren's apartment,"  He breathed.

"I know it's so great!  This is going to be great,"  I smirked.  "Sasha and Connie will be ready to help us-"

"If they aren't drunk already... Or making out in a corner."

"Nah, they'll be ready for us.  This is important to them, too.  Mostly so they can laugh at Eren, but whatever... Little fucker deserves it."

                The doors opened to reveal an empty hallway, but there was the faint beat of music from the other end.

"This is absolutely insane..."  Marco shook his head.  He opened his mouth as if he were going to say something when the door flew open.  

"I smell food!"  Sasha's eyes grew wide, and she sniffed and moaned.  She must have been waiting by the door for us.  "Pancakes..." 

                She reached out to the bags in our hands greedily, but I pulled them away quickly.

"No you little shit.  These are for the prank,"  I scoffed

"It's such a waste of good food though,"  She whined, shoulders slumped.

"No-"

"Jean... I think you should let her eat a pancake."  I glared at him from the corner of my eye.  "I mean... Let me explain.  If she eats one, and Eren can't find number whatever-it-is that she eats, he'll be desperately looking for it, but he won't be able to find it..."

                I stared at Marco, eyes wide, and jaw slack.  He was an evil genius.  I dropped the bags at my side and grabbed him, pressing his lips against mine.

"I fucking adore you,"  I declared when we broke apart. "You're a genius."

"Does this mean I get a pancake?"  Sasha demanded, after pulling a face at our display.

"Yeah, but-"  She snatched the plastic bag and broke into one of the to-go boxes.  "-There's Sharpie on them, so eat around it."

"Please don't ingest Sharpie,"  Marco suggested gently.

"I'll eat number 39,"  She whispered, staring lovingly at the pancake, before taking a huge bite of the side.  She then tore the sides off, and threw the center - the numbers now smudged- at my face.

"You bitch!"  I gasped and she fell on her back laughing.  "...Just take your boxes and hide the pancakes for god's sake."

                She cackled and grabbed some of the Styrofoam containers and took off, looking for Connie.  I glanced at Marco. 

"Let's do this!"  I grinned, picking up my bag.   Marco grabbed his, and shook his head.  He rolled his eyes once more and stepped into the party. 

                I followed him, into the dimly lit apartment.  Eren's place was pretty nice, and his neighbor's didn't mind his parties for some unknown reason.  I stepped into one of the spare rooms- the office- and opened a box.  I threw one on the bookshelf, and one on the windowsill.  Obvious places to let him know that they were there.  I snatched another and put it under the keyboard.   Three in here was probably good enough.  Someone else was sure to come back through this way and add a few.

                I continued hiding pancakes throughout the place, occasionally running into Sasha, or Connie, or Marco, but none of us said anything.  Anyone else who saw me was either hammered, or grinned when I put a finger to my lips.  They would all keep quiet.  No one was to interfere with the pranking war.  It was an unspoken rule everyone followed- except maybe Armin.  But luckily, there was no sight of him, and I emptied my boxes within 45 minutes.   I cackled as I threw my last pancake- Number 69- onto Eren's pillow.

                15 minutes later, Marco, Connie, Sasha and I were standing in the elevator, laughing our heads off.  Connie was gripping the side of the elevator, fingers white, and Sasha had her head thrown back against the mirror, shoulders shaking.  I was holding my chest, gasping for air at the whole situation.  It was ridiculous, and absolutely fucking brilliant.

"I threw a pancake in his shower thingy with shampoo and stuff,"  Connie wheezed.  He paused momentarily before adding: "He has a ton of hair stuff." 

                Sasha told us how she had hidden one in the toaster and one in a box of cereal; and told us exactly why it would be a pain in the ass to find.  Marco said he hid some in the spare set of sheets. He also put some in his closet, so that his clothes would smell like pancakes, and he would have to wash it all to get the smell out.  Again, evil fucking genius.

"I put one," I gasped for breath, holding my side "Number 69-"

"Tell me you did! Please god tell me you put it on his bed!"  Sasha grabbed my shoulders, and shook me.

                I nodded, and that sent us all into another round of hysterics.

"I'm actually scared of how Eren is going to react,"  Marco said quietly, sobering us up momentarily.

"He's going to flip shit!"  Connie blurted, and the laughing resumed.  The elevator doors slid open and we stepped into the lobby, being quiet because it was like 3 am or something and this was an apartment building.   We may be college students but we weren't _always_ assholes.

                Sasha split up with us after the first block, heading towards her dorm on the other side of campus.  She gave Connie a quick kiss before sauntering through the doors.  Connie stayed with us for another little bit before we arrived at his building, and he waved and grinned like an idiot.  Marco and I walked quietly back to our own, hands linked and empty bags swaying beside us in the slight wind.

               

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Part 3:  The Aftermath**

                I woke up with a shit-eating grin on my face.  It was only 9, so Eren wouldn't be awake yet, but the pancakes were there, just waiting to be found.  I let out a short burst of laughter that I just couldn't contain.  I wish I could be there to see his face when he found the first one, whichever it would be.  I laughed again as I realised it would probably 69. 

                I got out of my bed and padded over to the dresser.   I grabbed one of Marco's sweaters that I had worn a lot during the time I had spent finding my own shirts.  I pulled it on, and fixed my hair as best as I could without a mirror.  I turned when I heard Marco's bed creak as he stood up.

"Morning!"  I called gleefully.

"Morning,"  he smiled in that gentle way he does, and it was made ten times cuter because he was always adorably sleepy in the mornings. "I would ask why you're so cheery, but I know the answer."

"I'm so proud of myself for coming up with that!"  I grinned.  "And I'm proud of you for your breakthroughs on the concepts of pranking last night.  I can't wait to see how the little shit is going to react."  

                Marco didn't say anything, he just smiled at me like the dork he was.  I pulled him towards me and kissed him.  He made a noise of protest but continued kissing back.

"I haven't brushed my teeth yet."  He explained when we broke apart, and then walked away to do just that.

"What do you want to do today?"  He asked a few minutes later, emerging from the bathroom.

"I dunno,"  I said with a shrug.  "But we have to avoid Jaeger."

                Marco shook his head with a quiet laugh.

"Alright,"  He spoke with a smile. "That makes sense since he will totally kill you on sight."

"Hell yeah he will!"  I laughed.  "Little shit is so full of spite."

"Mmm..."  Marco pursed his lips.  "He's not so bad, Jean..."

I start to interrupt him but he holds up his hand and finishes his thought. 

"I'll admit he's rude to you."  Marco says, his lips pulled down in one corner in a lopsided frown.

"Rude?  He's a complete jerk!"

"I know...I- I'm sorry."  He sighed.

"Don't be..."  I trailed off.  "Hey, uh, maybe we could go for pizza?"

"Jean, it's 9:30 in the morning.  Don't you think it's a bit early for pizza?"

"It's never too early for pizza!"  I exclaimed, and grabbed his hand, trying to pulling him out the dorm.

"Well, okay, but the pizza place doesn't open until 11..." He smirked, and I sighed.

"Goddamn it, Marco."

"Well, we could game until 11, and then go out?"

"Eren will definitely find us if we stay here."

"Hmm..We could go for a walk?"  He suggested.  "That way we'll be moving around so it'll be hard to find us?"

"You're so smart,"  I pulled him towards the door once again.

                He grabbed his jacket and then grabbed mine, too, handing it to me with a light smile.  I held the door open for him and we walked down the hall to the elevator.  I pressed the button, and stepped to the side while waiting.  There was a quiet groan of the doors sliding open, and we stepped into the lift.  Another groan followed when Marco pressed the "Lobby" button. 

                His hand slid into mine and the doors opened to a mostly empty lobby.  We walked out into the (surprisingly) fresh air of campus.  I grabbed my beanie from my coat pocket, and pulled it on.

                We walked around in the brisk air, mostly carefree, since we were pretty sure Jaeger wouldn't be up until noon.  Nothing interesting happened, and at  11, we made our way to the pizza place.  There, we ordered ourselves the best pizza ever, and ate together.   We had a peaceful morning, until we were headed back to our dorm, figuring Eren would have been there and gone by now.

                We arrived at the familiar building, I saw him shove the door open, fuming, and looking incredibly hung-over.  I laughed loudly, which was a mistake, because he turned at the sound.  We made eye-contact, and his expression was one of pure rage.  It was enough to strike fear into my heart.

"Oh, shit.  Marco, we gotta run!"

                I turned in the other direction, and pulled Marco along.  After a few seconds, I let him go so he could catch his balance and run beside me.  My feet pounded the ground as I tried to avoid running into anyone or tripping.

 "You piece of shit get back here!"  I turned to see Eren hot on our heels, a ball of pure rage.  If he had been at full health, he would have caught us.  Thankfully, he was probably nursing a massive headache and some nausea.   "I swear to god I'll kill you!"

                I was out of breath before long, and I knew that we wouldn't last much longer like this.  I grabbed Marco's arm again to pull him around a corner, and kept running.  We'd have to try and lose the little shit instead of outrun him.

"You fucking hid pancakes in my apartment I'm going to throttle you!" 

"Marco!"  I gasped, turning my head to see where he was.  He was on my left, slightly behind me.  "As soon as we lose him- pancake shop!"

"Got it!"  He exclaimed. 

                We turned a few more corners, checking behind us every time, but Eren had determination like no other.  Threats being screamed angrily usually warned me of his presence but it didn't stop me from looking to see how close he was getting.  He was falling behind, thank the lord.  I quickly slid behind a wall, and Marco followed.  I barely breathed as Eren ran right by, not having seen us hide.   

"Fucking finally,"  I grinned at Marco beside me, breathing heavily.  Grabbing his wrist, I flopped onto the grass, pulling him down with me.  He gasped as his ass hit the ground, and I laughed a little too loudly. 

"He's going to come back here once he can't find us anymore,"  Marco pointed out wisely.  "I don't know how he didn't see us hide."

"What can I say?  I'm a ninja,"  I winked at him.  Marco rolled his eyes but smiled, and that was good enough for me.  "Alright, let's go." 

                I pushed myself off the damp grass and offered a hand to Marco.  He accepted and after brushing ourselves off we headed to the pancake place.  I realised halfway there that the dude we talked to last night wasn't going to be working, and we hadn't even asked for his name. 

"How are we going to tell the guy what happened?"

"What do you mean?"  He asked, head cocked to the side. 

"We don't know his name, and he's not going to be working right now."

"We can ask one of the people there?  I mean his co-workers are bound to know him."

"Sounds like a plan."

                We got there and explained the situation to a girl behind the counter.  She laughed for like 5 minutes straight before scribbling a number on an old receipt, handing it to us with a smile.

" Come back anytime, you two!  I would love to hear more stories!"  She called before turning to the next person in line, her caramel hair swinging just above her shoulders.

                Marco gave her a thumbs-up, paired with a cheesy grin before we walked out of the front doors.  My hand found his effortlessly, and we grinned at each other.

                Eren was still definitely going to kill me, and I couldn't keep running from him forever.  But, hey, it would make one hell of a funny story for later.


End file.
